Does a disobedient child necessarily come to collect a past-life debt?

Do not conclude that from disobedience. Pregnant parents have asked whether a child comes to repay kindness or collect debt, and I generally do not answer such questions. Whatever the past connection, this is your child and the present task is good care. Questions about upbringing and difficulties can return to practical discussion.

Through religious service, I have discussed both kinds of connection and another: children without a particularly deep parental bond who enter a household because its environment suits their soul’s learning and growth. Connections are not limited to gratitude and debt, and less closeness does not justify a hurried conclusion.

I understand the disappointment of giving much without the expected response. But children have their own thoughts, growth and lessons. Offer love, affirmation and support and understand their needs. Care need not wait every time for repayment in an identical form.

Good treatment does not excuse wrongdoing. Clearly teach boundaries rather than always say the child is too young to understand. Parents should discuss shared duties and find balance when both are tired. During crying or tantrums, watch your emotions rather than turn exhaustion and dissatisfaction into striking the child or venting on them.

Growing children develop work, friendships and lives, so shared time naturally changes. I left home for work in my twenties and never moved back, yet still love my parents and want outings together when free. My father helps daily so I see him more than my mother. Families differ. Living apart or muted responses cannot alone negate affection. Treasure available companionship and gradually allow each other space.

Before becoming a teacher, I too was told by a fortune-teller that I came to collect parental debts and therefore needed misfortune so my parents would resolve it. Later I refused to remain trapped in that account: if both I and my parents suffered, why must life follow it? I began working to change, relying less on their help and hoping to care for them in return.

Ming Fen shared being mischievous and troubling her mother as a child. Reading, reflecting on parenting and mutual adjustment later changed their relationship. This was her household’s experience, not every child’s. But it shows that beyond gratitude-debt categories, present teaching and interaction still allow effort.