Why may a child struggle when parents suddenly demand self-funded university tuition after paying for everything?

Independence is learned gradually. Turning eighteen does not suddenly teach someone everything. If parents arranged everything throughout childhood and only at university announce that all responsibility now belongs to the child, the child may be unprepared and even feel the parents no longer want to care.

I discussed news about a female university student required to pay her own tuition. She felt her parents could afford it but refused to help, while they said they wanted her to learn independence. I wondered whether the two sides understood each other: how had they taught and communicated before, was she prepared, and how much could she afford now? Saying “You are already an adult” cannot dispose of all these questions.

If you hope children will support themselves as adults, explain expectations gradually while they are young and allow them to learn responsibility in everyday life. If parents normally handle everything and abruptly impose different demands in adulthood, immediate acceptance is difficult. With earlier learning and communication within the family, children can better understand what you mean by independence and what you hope they will learn and become able to do.