How can children learn faith without only praying whenever problems arise?

We can gradually introduce children to faith through everyday life. From the beginning, however, they should understand that praying to deities and Buddhas also requires earnest effort on their own part. Prayer and effort belong together. It is not a matter of handing everything to the Bodhisattva and then waiting for the result.

In the past, I did not specifically require my children to learn everything at the spiritual centre or attend every activity. Only when they were older did I gradually explain the relationship between the deities and Buddhas and our family. I told them that these deities and Buddhas were important members of our family. Because of the help we had received along the way, Dad was able to serve others and support the household. I hoped the children would begin understanding their faith through this genuine feeling of connection.

My daughter said that she would greet the Bodhisattva before going to school. Sometimes she simply paid her respects and went out. Once, before a competition selection, she asked whether she could sponsor a lamp to pray for things to go smoothly. I found that interesting and used the opportunity to explain that she needed to work hard herself. Some things also need heavenly help, and she could pray to deities and Buddhas, but lighting a lamp did not mean that she no longer needed to prepare seriously.

The intention behind a prayer also needs to be fulfilled through action. Because we hope things will go smoothly, we become more willing to act and find strength to keep moving forward. This is what I hope children learn from faith. Even the idea that requests receive a response cannot leave out the condition that we ourselves make an earnest effort.

When talking about faith with children, we can also begin by listening to what they enjoy. My daughter likes anime and tells me about stories and characters. Through discussing them together, I also help her understand more about what we ordinarily do. She enjoys dancing, so we talk about the joy of dancing and how to bring happiness to other people. Children can share their world while adults share their own lives. This kind of exchange brings us closer than constantly explaining principles to them.

We also need to distinguish not forcing a child to take over the family work from failing to explain our own life to them. Looking back, I felt some regret that, in hoping to give my children freedom of choice, I had missed opportunities to share the relationship between deities, faith and our family. We can first explain things properly so they understand what their parents are thinking, while still leaving them room to choose. We do not need to wait until they are grown and expect them to understand naturally.

A mother came to ask about her child’s situation and later mentioned that the child had experienced some unusual sensitivities from an early age. I suggested gradually helping the child understand faith, so that when afraid there would be a trusted deity to turn to for support. I also invited the child to visit and worship when there was time. The mother had participated in remote fright-calming and purification and said she was willing to learn more. This describes that family’s request for help and the religious advice offered. It does not mean that all children must follow the same practice, or that having faith guarantees they will never feel afraid again.